{"product_id":"where-i-met-myself","title":"WHERE I MET MYSELF","description":"\u003cdiv class=\"gE iv gt\"\u003e\n\u003ctable cellpadding=\"0\" class=\"cf gJ\"\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr class=\"acZ\"\u003e\n\u003ctd class=\"gF gK\"\u003e\n\u003ctable cellpadding=\"0\" class=\"cf ix\"\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd class=\"c2\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 class=\"iw gFxsud\"\u003e\u003cspan translate=\"no\" class=\"qu yKyxu\" role=\"gridcell\" tabindex=\"-1\"\u003e\u003cspan name=\"Cami Mclelland\" data-hovercard-id=\"camim6477@gmail.com\" class=\"gD\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCami Mclelland\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"cfXrwd\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"go\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-hidden=\"true\"\u003e\u0026lt;\u003c\/span\u003ecamim6477@gmail.com\u003cspan aria-hidden=\"true\"\u003e\u0026gt;\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ch3 class=\"iw rapwed\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd class=\"gH VYc0jb\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"gK\"\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"g3\" title=\"Mar 26, 2026, 5:28 AM\" alt=\"Mar 26, 2026, 5:28 AM\" role=\"gridcell\" id=\"avWBGd-40\" tabindex=\"-1\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"avWBGd-41\"\u003e5:28 AM (0 minutes ago)\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"jvIjkd\" id=\"avWBGd-42\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv role=\"checkbox\" aria-checked=\"false\" aria-label=\"Not starred\" class=\"zd SKW8Ab\" id=\"avWBGd-43\" data-tooltip=\"Not starred\" tabindex=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"T-KT\" id=\"avWBGd-44\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd class=\"gH\"\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd class=\"gH acX bAm VN9Psd\" rowspan=\"2\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"X92YGb\" id=\"avWBGd-45\"\u003e\u003cspan data-is-tooltip-wrapper=\"true\"\u003e\u003cbutton class=\"pYTkkf-JX-I pYTkkf-JX-I-ql-ay5-ays R1Zuwf\" id=\"sjs_4\" data-idom-class=\"R1Zuwf\" data-use-native-focus-logic=\"true\" disabled aria-label=\"You can't react with an emoji to a group\" data-tooltip-enabled=\"true\" data-tooltip-id=\"tt-c40\"\u003e\u003c\/button\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cspan data-is-tooltip-wrapper=\"true\"\u003e\u003cbutton class=\"pYTkkf-JX-I pYTkkf-JX-I-ql-ay5-ays DILLkc\" id=\"sjs_5\" data-idom-class=\"DILLkc\" data-use-native-focus-logic=\"true\" aria-label=\"Reply\" data-tooltip-enabled=\"true\" data-tooltip-id=\"tt-c41\"\u003e\u003c\/button\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"sjs_6\" class=\"tB5Jxf-M-X-ql-Jf\" data-keep-pressed-state=\"false\" aria-labelledby=\"qhu9y\" data-is-menu-hoisted=\"true\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cspan data-is-tooltip-wrapper=\"true\"\u003e\u003cbutton class=\"pYTkkf-JX-I pYTkkf-JX-I-ql-ay5-ays Wsq5Cf\" data-idom-class=\"Wsq5Cf\" data-use-native-focus-logic=\"true\" aria-label=\"More message options\" data-tooltip-enabled=\"true\" data-tooltip-id=\"tt-c42\" id=\"qhu9y\"\u003e\u003c\/button\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr class=\"acZ xD\"\u003e\n\u003ctd colspan=\"3\"\u003e\n\u003ctable cellpadding=\"0\" class=\"cf adz\"\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd class=\"ady\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"iw ajw\"\u003e\u003cspan translate=\"no\" class=\"hb\"\u003eto\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan data-hovercard-id=\"camim6477@gmail.com\" name=\"me\" class=\"g2\"\u003eme\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv aria-haspopup=\"true\" class=\"ajy\" role=\"button\" id=\"avWBGd-47\" data-tooltip=\"Show details\" aria-label=\"Show details\" tabindex=\"0\"\u003e\u003cimg class=\"ajz\" src=\"https:\/\/mail.google.com\/mail\/u\/2\/images\/cleardot.gif\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\":q0\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\":pz\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"KKSLrd\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"qQVYZb\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"utdU2e\" id=\"avWBGd-48\"\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"wl4W9b\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"aHl\" id=\"avWBGd-49\"\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\":pp\" tabindex=\"-1\"\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"ii gt\" id=\":px\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"a3s aiL\" id=\":py\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"avWBGd-52\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"adM\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"adM\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis piece almost didn’t make it into the collection and this isn’t the first time I’ve said that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEvery time I looked at it, I didn’t recognize the person in it. I kept trying to change it, adjusting things over and over, thinking if I just fixed one more part it would finally make sense. But the more I touched it, the more disconnected it felt. The more I started questioning my vision. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEventually I walked away from it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThroughout this collection there seems to be a pattern of leaving things unfinished, or maybe just giving myself the time to process before returning.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor months it sat on my wall beside an earlier piece in this collection called Hope. They lived next to each other while everything else in my studio kept shifting around them. Looking back now, it’s funny because those two pieces ended up going in completely different directions, but somehow they were always heading to the same place and ironically enough, right next to each other in the same collection.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAt the time, I didn’t understand that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEvery time I passed this painting, I felt frustrated because I thought the painting itself was the problem. But when I finally came back to it, I realized something uncomfortable but honest: the painting wasn’t wrong. I was just trying to force meaning out of something before I was ready to understand it. I knew something was missing, but I couldn’t see it until the timing was more aligned.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eInstead of fixing it, I covered the center with a blank piece of canvas and started again.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat moment changed the piece.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOriginally the mirrors in this painting were clean. They reflected a version of myself that felt almost too neat, too controlled. When I came back months later, that didn’t feel honest anymore. So I literally took a hammer and shattered the mirror. I broke the glass and embedded those fragments throughout the painting, across the face and within the surface.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe reflections became fractured. Blurry. Imperfect. Real.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThere are details in this piece I wish people could see in person. The eye, for example, has a subtle lens layered into it. It’s small, but it matters, because this painting isn’t about suddenly seeing everything clearly. It’s about perspective changing and realizing that sometimes the world around you doesn’t change, only the way you see it does.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEven the background reflects that moment in time. Earlier pieces in this collection are full of bold color and movement, but this one is much more muted. At the time I created it, I didn’t have the same clarity yet. My thoughts were quieter, heavier, more uncertain. The colors reflect that space. Later in the collection, I noticed a few more pieces became muted as well. Maybe I carried my original familiarity with this piece into those without even realizing it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut what makes this piece especially meaningful to me is the way it holds experimentation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBefore this collection, I had never worked with anything besides watercolor. I was learning everything as I went. I had notes written down from the most random discoveries and things that seem obvious now, like realizing you can’t put acrylics over oils. At the time, I genuinely didn’t know. I thought paint was just paint.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis painting became a place where I started exploring everything.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThere are oil pastels worked into the surface. Matte textures against glossy rain. Thick areas of paint sitting next to softer, blended spaces. It was the first time I really allowed myself to explore what art could do rather than trying to control what it looked like.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThere are also materials in this piece that carry meaning from the rest of the collection.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFire, cliffs, and elements of the sky appear in different forms throughout many of these paintings. It’s been what I’m drawn to recently. They’re symbols of intensity, height, perspective, and openness. They often show up abstractly, like clouds or atmosphere woven into the background.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd then there’s the yarn.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou’ll see small strands worked into the painting, almost quietly sitting within the surface. That yarn was originally meant for a completely different piece that I couldn’t make sense of at the time. I had set it aside like another unfinished idea.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut eventually I realized it belonged here.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBecause yarn, to me, always represented unraveling things. Pulling apart the threads of experiences, memories, and questions to understand what they’re made of. And sometimes when you unravel something, it doesn’t fall apart, it reveals the structure underneath it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eInterestingly enough, my very first complete painting was called Unraveled. It’s funny how full circle that feels now, seeing literal strands of yarn show up again here. That piece isn’t included in this collection, though. It deserved its own space entirely. In a lot of ways, it sits outside of this body of work. It belongs to a different moment, a different realization.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut somehow the thread of it still found its way here.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis piece became a place where all of those discoveries started meeting each other, technically as an artist, and personally as a human.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhen I look back through this collection, none of the paintings look the same. The styles shift. The colors change. The techniques evolve.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor a while I used to criticize myself for that. I thought maybe I didn’t have a voice yet. I worried people wouldn’t recognize my work because it didn’t look consistent. I was insecure at one point even putting these pieces next to each other because of how different they all were.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut now I understand.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThese paintings look different because I was different while creating them. Each one reflects a real moment of learning, questioning, rebuilding, and growing. They hold the parts of me that were scared, the parts of me that were curious, the darker places I had to face, and the unexpected moments where I found joy again.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhere I Met Myself holds all of that at once.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt isn’t just the title of this painting. It’s the realization that came from everything in this collection, that through all the confusion, loneliness, questions, and rebuilding, I was slowly learning how to sit with myself long enough to recognize who I actually am.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor a long time, being alone felt like something painful. Like something was missing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut somewhere along the way, that started to change. I began to understand that solitude doesn’t always mean emptiness. Sometimes it means space, space to create, to think, to heal, and to grow in ways that no one else can see yet.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd the truth is, there were moments during this season where I genuinely didn’t think I would make it to this chapter or to this exact page.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut I did.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd if there is anything I hope someone feels when they stand in front of this piece, it’s this: life doesn’t always ask us to have everything figured out. Sometimes it just asks us to keep going. Standing, sitting, crawling, whatever that looks like.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBecause if you’re still here, you’re still growing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA while ago I wrote the words, “To discover joy is to learn how to live twice.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAt the time, I thought I understood what that meant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI didn’t.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBecause discovering joy isn’t about returning to the life you once had. It’s about learning how to build a new one after everything you thought defined you has changed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd somewhere in the middle of learning how to do that…\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI realized something I hadn’t understood before.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe person I had been searching for this entire time\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ewas the one standing here all along.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Ramsaydigitals","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":45985989460164,"sku":null,"price":0.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0691\/1623\/1876\/files\/IMG_2429_1.jpg?v=1774517266","url":"https:\/\/ramsaystudioart.store\/products\/where-i-met-myself","provider":"Ramsaydigitals","version":"1.0","type":"link"}